TOTALLY DISAPPOINTED & NEGLECTED!!!!

wat e hell is tis.. i dont think we can make it longer anymore..

u dont even noe y im like tis..

dont even bother to ask me u im like tis..

wat is tis..

WTF!!!

what ever i say i dont mean it at all..

when i say i was okay, i wasnt alright.. im always worrying about u..

when i say im happy, im actually dying inside..

when i say i wasnt thinking about u anymore, im dying to see u..

when i say i wan to leave u, i wan to keep u most by my side..

when i say i dont care about u anymore, i wan u to care more about me..

when i say i dont wan to know wat u where doing, i wan u to know wat im doing..

bb.. do u know all this??

do u know wat im thinking??

do u know war i really wan??

do u know how am i feeling??

do u know how much tears have i drip??

does people lie really because they really really love them??

does people lie cos they don't the person they love e most to get hurt??

does people lie cos they wan to protect them??

does people lie cos they don't wan them to know e hurtful truth??

does people lie cos there is reason behind it??

does people lie cos they wan to keep a person image perfectly inside them??

does people lie cos they wan them to live happily??

does people lie cos they don't wan to take away the smile from them??

DOES ALL THIS LIES REALLY HELP??

DO THEY REALLY THINK THAT THIS LIES REALLY MAKE THEM HAPPIER??

DO THEY KNOW THAT ONCE THE PERSON KNOW THAT ALL THIS WAS A LIE THE OUTCOME WILL BE THE MOST HURTFUL AND PAINFUL MOMENT..

WHEN THE PERSON KNOW THAT ALL THIS WAS A LIE ,

WHEN THE PERSON COME TO IT'S SENSE,

THE PERSON WILL LOSE ALL THE TRUST THAT ACCUMULATED ALL THE WHILE..

THE PERSON MIGHT JUST NOT BE ABLE TO BELIEVE ANYBODY ANYMORE..

OR EVEN HAVING DIFFICULTIES TRUSTING PEOPLE..

tis afternoon when out to taka to apply for job there..

after applying walk to plaza with yong they all..

wanted to watch but dont have any show tat e timing is rite..

so we when to arcade to play game while waiting for yuan to come n meet us..

after tat they when to smoke after awhile they go shopping den decided to go play lan..

i didnt play cos i was too tired.. i sit at e side.. but while watching them play i fall a slp..

hahaha.. but after a short nap i was more awake.. not so tired..

after they play finish game den i went hm..

it was still drizzling.. i took bus 7 hm.. e bus was super cold..

went hm for dinner too.. so yummy.. popo cook de food e best.. :D

i wan to eat always!!! hahahahahha...

:'( after watching e show im sad now..

y does ppl can have a proper family i dont have??

i wan to have a happy life like all kids have when they were young..

y i cant have tis type of life???

every nite my emotional just haunts me down with sadness..

just how much tears do i have to drop in order to let it dry up???!!!!

im really sick of all tis thing in my life!!!!

sometimes i really dont feel like living in tis world anymore..

i always blame mummy for giving birth to me..

blame daddy for leaving us..

blame daddy for making mummy heart broken..

blame daddy for making her having hard time bringing us up..

blame daddy for making mummy lost her smile, happiness!!!

i blame everything on HIM!!!!

I WILL NEVER FORGIVE HIM!!!

NEVER NEVER NEVER!!!!!

so many days nv blog again.. hahaha.. too lazy liao..

i should change to have a habit to blog..

at least i will feel better after i blog..

at least i get to vent out all my emotional out inside here..

doesnt matter whether im sad, happy or angry.

i can throw them away here..

n crying in reality..

tis few days i have been going out almost everyday..

ytd n today when bak to sch in e morning..

after tat i was super tired.. but after a short nap.. im more awake..

but blur blur.. hahaha..

i finally when to watch movie again.. hahahahahaha..

watch gui ye siao.. quite funny.. but got some part i kana shock by e sound..

every since dec last year.. this few days it has been raining none stop..

n e weather super cold.. luckily i didnt get sick from all tis bad weather..

must really stay healthy tis year onwards.. cannot sick anymore..

HEALTHY HEALTHY HEALTHY!!!!

as usual i was so clumsy tat i injured myself when i was getting off e stage..

got a scratch on my knee.. super pain.. e stupid stage floor super super rough.. like e road..

lucky not very bad.. no blood come out..

next time i should be more careful..

so jialet keep injured myself.. hehehehehe.. :P

guess i going to slp soon today.. super duper tired..

hopefully i get enough slp tis time round..

n go look for a job..

n go enroll.. hahahaha..

hope i dont lazy again!!! :D